Posts tagged Valentine's Day
Valentine’s Day, the day of love…… and overpriced chocolates and flowers. Love gets a lot of PR. We sing about love, the effects it does to us, how it makes us feel, how we want to be in love, love someone and to have someone love us. There is a problem notice with people and their dealings with cupid’s arrows.
I have noticed a trend while reading for others regarding love. Either one person or both persons in the relationship do not truly love the other. They are in love with some other aspect. Either they are in love with the idea of having a relationship while not being active in it or just love the superficial aspects of love. One specific reading I did the cards told me that the woman’s boyfriend liked the idea of having her in his life, but did not want anything more. The relationship was all mental and in the mind, not in the physical world. For others relationships are only physical without any mental or emotional connection.
Most people also truly do not know what true love is and are confused about it is. This is because there are different kinds of love. We are going to talk about two specific kinds of love. The first is Eros and the second is Agapi. Eros and Agapi are two Greek words for specific forms of love that are used in religious and philosophical theories about love.
Eros is love that is passionate, desiring, and sensual; often dealing with physical attraction this is the normal romantic kind of love. Falling into love and love at first sight, these sorts of things is linked to the concept of Eros. The word erotic comes from Eros. This is often thought to be “real” love but it is not. In the Greek language they use words rooted in Eros to express this idea. “Erotevmeni” means falling into love, being in love in a typical romantic image.
Agapi on the other hand is the higher form of all the loves, it is selfless love. It is unconditional love, like the kind a parent has for a child but also the love someone has for another that is truly “real love”. It is a love that is deeper than Eros. Apapi is rooted in loyalty, trust, honoring the sacredness of the union between the two who are in love. In the Greek language when Agapi is used it refers to this concept of true love or real love deeply connected between two people.
In the New Testament when speaking about love the word Agapi is used to express what love is. In 1 Corinthians chapter 13, love is described as,
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
These are the greatest words even written in the bible in my opinion.
In the Tarot when looking for a card or cards that represent love we will automatically go to The Lovers. However after learning what we have about Eros and Agapi, we see that the Lovers are
associated with the Eros concept of love. In older decks Cupid (Roman version of Eros) is depicted. The Lovers indicate more of a desire and sexual form of love. So which tarot card shows Agapi? I look at the 2 of Cups and see Agapi depicted. If you look at the 2 of Cups you see a man and a woman of equal height, facing once another embracing each other with the union of their cups. This shows that are receiving and giving to one another, unconditional love.
Speaking of tarot, what does tarot have to say about the business of love? Well I asked tarot five questions (using my Osho Zen Tarot) about love and the answers are very interesting.
What is Love? Receptivity
Giving is often thought to be what love is (in the Kabbalah mind set) seeing the Receptivity card throws a wrench into that theory. Receptivity is about being open to receiving, in this case receiving love. In the context of the Kabbalah view giving is what love is, as much as this may be a contradiction when you think about it, it is not. This card is reminding us that we also need to receive love. If we cannot receive love than how will other be able to give? You need both and I feel this is just a reminder. Receptivity at the core is openness, not closing yourself off or blocking anything.
What is Love not? Maturity
The Maturity card represents a moment where everything has come to a point of perfection almost of a completion. Love is not this? Hmm odd but kind of makes sense of you think that love is not something that you complete or becomes “perfect”, life is complicated and love is very complicated. So saying that it is not “Maturity” reflects this notion that love is always developing and everlasting with no “maturity date”. When I see the word maturity I see the image of growing up, love is not that. Like Cupid, love is young.
What do we mistake for love? The Dream
Oh how poetic for this card to appear, it is times like this that make me believe in tarot even more, this is too perfect! The Dream card is associated with the fairytale fantasy of love. We mistake our personal dreams of what love is to us, than what it really is. I also look at this card and see the desire to fulfill your own needs, love is not about you and your desires. This card concerns itself with the wanting and depending on others. Wanting is not love. On a deeper level this card is about, needing to love ourselves, cliché I know but it is true.
What keeps us from loving others? The Outsider
This is a profound card, The Outsider card reflects a cycle of feeling left out or excluded. That loving others is something that we cannot achieve or obtain. In the card the gate is chained but the lock is unlocked. To open the gate all you have to do is remove the chains, this can represent that loving other is a difficulty that is illusionary; it is our mindset that hinders us. We may be waiting for someone to come to us first and open the door for us.
What keeps others from loving us? Experiencing
The “Experiencing” card reflects the idea of truly being able to experience, communicate and be as one. The woman in this card is on with the tree, experiencing the tree and communicating with it. It seems difficult for people to truly love another because the actual process of loving truly is really deep and meaningful. It is being at one with each other and experiencing each other. This may too much for some to handle who only want more superficial love. This is why you see so many relationships based off of sex and physical aspects. People don’t want such a deep experience.
Ask your tarot or oracle deck
1) How do I perceive love/what does love mean to me?